Formula TURTLE

Flat, Fast and VERY Furious!

Of all the events in the 14 race German Cycling Cup Series,  Circuit Cycling: Hockenheimring is by far one of the greatest.  The chance to race on the prestigious Formula 1 track is only challenged by the race at Nürburgring in July but that one is far from flat. Hockenheimring is not only flat but  über fast with a few sharp turns.  It favors those with legs like tree trunks and lungs like whales.  Once turned on the heat does not stop until the very end leaving ashes of the less fortunate racers in its wake . . . simply AWESOME!!!

Last year crashes stopped the racing mid execution and I had to really “man up” to get back on my bike.  My little TURTLE sticks were close to breaking under the pressure of this race.  I really don’t know how I managed to finish 60th in my age group last year.  It must of been a timing error . . .

This year we had a Fantastic 4 Evolution Cycling Club p/b Long & Foster-Euro Division riders hitting the track and one guest rider from US Military Cycling.  Over twice the numbers of the previous year and with great weather, the day could not be better . . .

Our token Britton...TIPSTER
Smiles before the carnage! 

Our token Britton, James TIPSTER Tipler was our star on the day.  This would be his last race with the Team here in Germany.  The kid is pure speed on the bike and I made a mental note to not let him lap me on the 6k course.  Jenn Call, our other team star, was sitting fairly high in the over all Jedermann ranking and I told her to stay close to me and I will carry her through the day.  She joked that if she stayed on my wheel she would win the women’s category . . . we both laughed at the thought as we made our way to the start.

The mass start at Hockenheimring is scary.  All groups (A and B, and both a 60K and a 90K distance) are started together.  CRAZY!!!  It is a mass of carbon, aluminum (some steel) and a lot of colorful spandex as close to 750 riders hit the line all starting at the same time.  It is and can be certainly intimidating to the unprepared soul.  We found ourselves grouped in the back of the second wave.  UGH!  At the back of the bus again I thought to myself as I was already dreading the first tight turn . . .

As we rolled out I was separated from the Team but watched TIPSTER go up the road doing what fast young fast riders do . . . ride faster!!!  I was certain HAMMER (Jeff Pannaman) was on my six as I made my way through the pack.  However, I did not look back as I feared the slightest break in concentration would make TURTLE hamburger and the last thing I wanted was a crash.  LT DAN (Dan Schmacher, our guest rider from US Military Cycling) was also in the mass behind me.  He had opted for the shorter distance and with legs like tree trunks, I figured at some point he would blaze by me and I would sit on his wheel as best I could . . .

Carbon, Aluminium, and Spandex
prepare for battle . . .

Through the first few laps the field was already into 3 major groups.  The super fast riders on the front led by the super teams, a small chase group with TIPSTER in the middle, and my chase group bringing up the rear.  I soon made my way through the mass and up to Jenn and told her to stay with me as best she could.  already riding at speeds well over 40 kph, she yelled back that the tempo was bit hot . . . and that it was.

Yet I felt great and moved up the inside to get to the front of my very large chase group.  Riding about 5 or so bikes off the front I went with a group of 4 off the front in an attempt to bridge up to the next group.  I yelled at my fellow riders to work it together and one guy joined in.  The other two cats were duds and the effort failed as the group seemed to surround us like a group of killer bees.  I did not have the power stores to do it alone . . . need to work on that!

Back in the mass group I wondered how many matches did that effort cost me.  But I still felt great and the tempo was still high as we were cursing at just over 40 kph.  So I sat in and thought through the scenarios as it appeared I was alone in the mass.  I knew it was a matter of time before HAMMER and LT DAN rode past me.  With any luck I would have the energy to join them and maybe bridge up to the group up the road . . . it was a dream and the only day dream I allowed myself to have as I was determined not to loose contact with this group.

The Lady in Pink

I spotted Claudia on almost every lap.  She stood out in the crowd wearing bright pink.  My eyes could not miss her and I actually found myself looking for her each lap.  This was the first race of this sort that she watched.  The numbers, the crashes (and there were a few) was most certainly unnerving to her.  I made no effort to wave or smile, even though I saw her every lap. I had to stay on the rivet and keep pushing . . .

With 5 laps to go and the surge to the line for the 60K racers, my legs began to suffer and the TURTLE sticks began to smolder from the heat the pace was making.  Muscle spasms shot through both quads.  It took everything in me to keep the pedals moving.  I had to gear down to spin out of the turns and stay in contact with my group.  I moved back a bit to give myself a little break and surround myself with wheels that I had watched over the last hour or so . . .

It was at this point that Jenn came up along side of me and put her hand on my shoulder.  She had hung about 5 - 10 bikes behind me the entire race so far.  AWESOME!!!  It was the motivation I needed.  I internally yelled (it was really a mumble), “Shut up legs!” and grabbed a gear or two and moved back up near the front of my chase group.  I took my turn at the front and did my best to kept the pace high . . .

With 3 laps to go the leaders came around and those that could caught the wave and hung onto their wheels.  They most have been really flying as we were still averaging 40 kph on the 6k circuit and they had just lapped us.  I saw all the big teams crushing the rest of us mere mortals as they went by . . . I knew TIPSTER would be next so I had to really put myself in suffer mode . . .

As much as I put myself in the TURTLE HURT LOCKER, I was at my limit and little to nothing in the tank, I could not respond to this second big surge.  After the carnage in the wake of the lead riders, I spent at least half a lap just on the front of my chase group with Jenn close behind.  Fluids were gone, legs were throbbing and I wanted this end and end quickly.  I just had to keep pedaling . . .

On the last lap I told Jenn to follow me to the final turn and I would put every last amount of energy into my pedals.  There were 2 other women in the chase group and I told Jenn she had to beat them both to the line . . .

I moved out on the final stretch and put my head down and into the wind.  Behind me was Jenn and one of the girls as we pulled away from the rest of the pack of about 20 riders.  Hitting the final turn with 100 m left to go I was done.  There was no more push and I think I just coasted to the line.  I had emptied the last and final drop of the TURTLE tank.  However, Jenn followed the gal that was on my wheel to the line and dug even deeper to finish a bike length ahead of her.  SWEET!!! 

On the day I took 130th overall and 30th in my age group.  However, Jenn scored big!  She took 5th overall for the women and 2nd in her age group (Master 2).  Our joking at the beginning became a reality.  This was the first Evolution Cycling Club podium in a European Jedermann event and a great day had just come to an end on an awesome and epic venue.  We averaged just under 40 kph ( 25 mph) for the 90 k.  It was and remains my fastest effort on the bike and two days later I still feel it . . .

Yet my eyes are focus on a time trial this coming weekend.  Time to man up again and dig just a little deeper as my season is far from over . . .

Bouncing off a Steep Wall (Steile Wand)

Returning to Leipzig for the Sparkassen Neuseen Classics – Rund um die Braunkohle (Race 4 of 14 in the German Cycling Cup) was all about bitter sweetness.  The event originally called for a 30K Time Trial (TT) on Saturday and 140K of road racing greatness on Sunday.  As most of you know, the TURTLE TT is far from graceful and 30K on the rivet was surly going to leave a few deep scares in the TURTLE shell that would take serious time and effort to buff out.  So I was not that sad when the TT was cancelled . . . the bitter was more like a lemon and I made a lemon drop martini to celebrate my good fortune.  I was saved a TT beat down . . . YES!!!

With the TT cancellation I noticed the road race was shortened to 125 K.  Having missed my start time last year due to my rather poor German reading skills, I was looking forward to the longer ride.  Yet my misfortune last year did introduced me to Team Steile Wand . . . a group of KOOL ‘n da GANG über fast ponies that make it happen on the road.  I was not only looking forward to seeing them again but with Evolution Cycling Club p/b Long & Foster - European Division rolling deep with 6 riders in the pack, I imagined a combined effort pushing through the field and leaving a wake of crushed legs and souls.  I was euphoric at the thought and it put a serious smile on my face and a swagger to my walk at work.  This was the sweetness of returning to Leipzig . . .

Registration had a few challenges as our crew was all over the map with two cats planning to register on the day of the race.  However, German efficiency ruled and our appeal to registration was answered.  We would all mass in the same start block near the front.  There was not much more we could ask for and this just increased the TURTLE fun factor . . .

Two days out, Coach Quest and I stuck with a slightly modified plan (I decided/needed to work half a day) and rolled up to Leipzig Friday afternoon.  Even though the Saturday TT was cancelled, we would use the extra day to get an easy spin and prep the legs for battle.  I had to get ahead of the butterflies that normally do cheetah flips inside the TURTLE.  Focus was needed and this extra day provided that . . .

We hit the road soon after breakfast on Saturday and while blessed with dry road conditions, we were quickly introduced to a few gusts of wind the nearly blew us sideways on the bike.    This was going to make racing tough but we were both up to the challenge . . .

At dinner that night we ate, laughed, lied about our mad bike skills, and plotted our strategy for cycling domination.  It was grand!  We would not ride 2 x 2 but stay together single file and make it happen attacking group after group.   With 6 Brothers (Matt DIESEL Arant, Eric COACH QUEST Cole, James DAPS Dapper, Jeff HAMMER Pannaman, and Erich DUMPER Schmunk) ready to roll . . . we had this!  We were bold and unafraid and ready to bring the action.  At the shorter distance Kozeta LES MIS Beam was out to hold her own.  Regardless of the talk . . . this was good and then some.

Rule # 80 // Always be Casually Deliberate

Waiting for others pre-ride or at the start line pre-race, you must be tranquilo, resting on your top tube thusly. This may be extended to any time one is aboard the bike, but not riding it, such as at stop lights.15 

(http://www.velominati.com/technology/look-pro-part-ii-casually-deliberate/)

Race morning, we rallied in the front of Start Block B.  DUMPER immediately said, “The goal is not to see any Block C riders!”  LOVE IT!  He set the bar high but achievable and I was up for the challenge.  We would have to survive the first 20K of madness, form up and get on with the business we came to do.  Team Steile Wand sat at the front of Block C and I made and and mental note to challenge myself and keep them behind me . . .

As we rolled out the combination of wind gusts and being at the front of our start block tough.  I was once again riding above threshold and I could feel the heat blowback on the TURTLE Shell.  I needed to get this under control and fast . . .

Just as I was about to blow a gasket, DIESEL came to the front, looked over his shoulder, and let out a serious almost battle cray yell of, “…lets go boys!” He did his DIESEL thing and the tempo was steady and hot.  I immediately fell back to recover in our chase peloton.  I needed off the front to keep my breakfast down as it was certainly moving up to my neck after the initial effort . . .

After DIESEL, DAPS took his turn and continued the drive.  So far our plan was executing as we boldly discussed the night prior.  We were pushing the pace and fairly close to one another.  It was on and we were in the think of it . . .

Recovered, I moved back up through the field and up to DAPS to give him a break after a serious effort.  HAMMER was with me as I went near the front of our group. 

The wind was crazy strong and the gusts were making organizing a chase of the Block A riders difficult.  The B-group began to split and HAMMER did what HAMMER does and surged across a gap.  I put my head down and tried to follow . . . I failed.  I pushed and pushed but HAMMER and crew went up the road.  He had made the selection as I was voted off the island . . .

I looked over my shoulder a few times trying to find teammates.  I had nothing.  The wind trumped our plan and fragmented the bunch.  I was on my own and settled in to organizing my chase of the group with HAMMER.  I rode pretty bold and hard as I had 4 teammates behind me on the road somewhere.  I saw this as a safety net bonus as I knew they would soon catch up to me and I would get a break.  So forward I went and just about drove myself into the red . . .

At some point DAPS rode up to me and I felt my position strengthen.  He mentioned that DIESEL and DUMPER were just behind us.  I took the data on and told DAPS we had to catch the group just in front of us to keep the drive going.  I put my head down and pressed across the gap.  I looked over my shoulder for DAPS and did not see him.  I was in a good group, taking a few pulls near the front and rolling.  I had made this selection and felt I had to keep it moving so I dug deep to stay in the mix . . .

I drifted back a bit to take a break and noticed the pace would come and go.  Fast ‘n Furious spins were countered by light tempo when the winds howled.  While I wanted to really push and make my goal of finishing in 3:15 or better,  I did not have the strength to push across the gap to the next group alone.  In truth, I was also afraid of going back into “no man’s land” given the current windy conditions.  The TURTLE power plant only had so much coal and matches to burn . . .

TURTLE and the Brother of Team Steile Wand

At the 60K point and half way through the madness the first of BLOCK B riders crossed into our group.  I looked over, heard a familiar laugh and “Turtle!”  The ponies of Team Steile Wand were rolling through.  I jumped right in and off we went.  We soon caught up to the HAMMER group and swarmed on them like a group of killer bees.  I yelled, “HAMMER…this is the Pony Express…GET ON!!!” and off we went.

It soon came time for me to take my pull at the front of the Peloton.  It was ugly!   Was at my limit trying to keep the pace the same and not give up any ground.  I joked about carrying this pace to the end with one of the Team Steile Wand Brother.  I was joking to cover the pain in my legs . . . inside alarms were going off left, right, up, down, and across.  I laughed to cover the sound of the alarm bells.  

I came off the front and was brought back into the Team rotation.  Even riding 8th wheel was a challenge for me.  At the next turn I drifted back to the middle of a group of at least 50 riders and decided to sit in.  Despite being in the best shape of my life, it was still not enough . . . yet.

I rolled up on the only member of Team Steile Wand not on the front and told him (in my best German) that his guys were crushing it on the front of this group.  He responded in English, “I know and it’s too much for me…”  I let out a short laugh grabbed a gear and held my line.  We had 40 K of road ahead and I wanted to stay in this group . . . 

A couple of surges and big wind gusts kicked me off the back as the group fragmented.  However, with a few matches left (I had lost count of exactly how many), I was able to get back in the pack and take refuge from the wind . . .

A serious crosswind hit I found myself in a bad position.  I burned even the wet matches to stay in contact.    I was also starting to feel a BONK coming.  I started unloading my pockets of food and downing fluids.  I had 20K to go and had to stay on it . . .

Another surge and wind gust caught me and took me out the back door of the peloton with 15K to go.  I turned to another rejected victim riding next to me and told him to help me close the gap.  He responded, “…too dangerous…”

WHAT!?!

I could not believe what I just heard.  I hesitated for a brief second in shock.  I quickly looked at his bike to see if I could identify where the grocery basket hung or if he was riding with training wheels.  “Too dangerous” . . . REALLY!?!  As close to bonk’n as I was, I put my head down and tried to drilled it.  I was alone in no man’s land heading to the finish.  This had happened just a 10 days prior in Frankfurt.  I failed to close the gap . . . IT SUCK’D!!!

With less than 10K to go I was caught by 2 cats and we started taking turns.  I came to the front of our three little pigs off the back with 3K to go and decided to leave nothing on the road.  I emptied the TURTLE Tank all the way to the line.

I rolled right up to Team Steile Wand assembled at the finish.  It was great to see them.  They were all laughing and joking. and enjoying the day.  I was looking for a lung, a shot of vodka, morphine, or something to end the pain in my core.  I was broken . . .

But laughter is addictive and a serious healing agent.  Last year the Ponies ran 6 deep.  This year the group totalled 13.  More than 10 of them were at the finish.  I was introduced to other members; pictures were taken as a historical marker of the day’s battle.  Life was good . . . it could not imagine it any better.

Life is bikeROCKstar!

Despite being an outcast and rejected from the Peloton with 15K to go, I had my best age group finish at 116th.  I’ll take that, try to get some rest, and get my mind and body ready to attack Circuit Cycling’s event on Hockenheimring and 90K of pure heat . . .

Ready I will be, ready I must . . . quitting is not an option!

A Hopeful Hat Trick

Well, after meeting my goals in the last two road races, I was ready to raise the bar, crush my enemies, see the driven before me, and hear the laminations of my fellow leg shaven and spandex covered brothers and sisters.  With only 3 days in-between race 2 and 3, I was floating on a drug-free high.  It was all the best I could imagine of my current quest for a bikeROCKstar life . . .

I had planned to spin my legs out and get ready for the Škoda Velotour: Rund um den Finanzeplatz  in Frankfurt.  I wanted to be ready, willing, and able to bring the action on the 11 k climb up the “Großer Feldberg.”  At 878 m ( ~2900 ft) this is the highest peak in the Taunus mountains and no joke during a race.  This was no Sunday stroll or coffee shop ride.  This was a beast I had to serve up a Chicago beat down in order to make my goal of finishing under 3 hrs (finished 3:44 last year) . . .

But with most thing, life happens and my three days of desired SIT ’N SPIN (EASY) HELL to keep my legs mobile and fresh did not happen.  Stress levels rose, sleep became problematic, and courage in the face of a challenge began to retreat.  I was sliding backwards . . . UGH!!!

Although we had 5 riders heading to Frankfurt, I was solo on this quest and that added to my list of challenges.  I would have to ride smart, look for the right wheels and cover gaps in the field alone.  This was going to be tough.  I had grown use to a wingman in battle.  Yet it was not in the cards for me at this time . . .

On the drive up the day prior, the weather also started to roll in as Danny Havard and I were caught in a hail storm.  Pea and larger sized hail struck my truck and danced on the top tub of my rig in the back of the bed.  This was going from bad to worse.  I was not looking forward to a climb up to over 850 m and a descent in the rain or maybe hail.  Did that last year and . . . “Hated it!”  I was ready to turn tail and hide in my TURTLE Shell until the sun shined and the roads were dry . . .

Danny and I arrived at our hotel after the reception had gone to bed . . .WHAT? it was only 2100!  I guess others need more beauty sleep than I do.  I should have called when we were at packet pickup but we were hanging around with other members of our team and some of the officials . . . SILLY TURTLE!!!  However, Jenn Call took care of us and had our keys and all was good in the bike ‘hood.  It truly is awesome to have a Team and stay in the same hotel.  A bright spot peaked out of the storm clouds . . .

On race morning we had breakfast together (I was late as it took me longer to get pretty shaving my legs), covered down on our rooms, and met in the parking lot for the 3 k spin to the start in a light fog and mist to hopefully meet up with DUMPER (Erich Schmunk) and SKIRT (Alex Ferguson).  While not officially on the Evolution roster, the bug bit SKIRT in Köln and he was back for more.  AWESOME!!!

As I sat in my start block watching the shorter distances roll out, I saw Danny walking back to registration.  I did some quick math and could not figure out why he was not on the road.  His start time had passed.  Little did I know there was a problem at registration and although he requested the shorter (and flat) distance, he was placed in the 104 k race.  In a mix of German and English he was told, “go make the best of your money” and do the 104 k.  Danny “manned up” and did just that in an epic ride that I will cover later . . .

As this was all going on I looked over my shoulder and saw HAMMER (Jeff Pannaman) joining the field.  I yelled and the Germans around me jumped at the sudden break in the silence.  In my chilly, grey, and threat of rain world, the sun just started shining.  My teammate and wingman was in and attacking this beast in tandem was much better than solo.  Confidence started to return and fear began to fade.  It’s amazing how quickly I got my cranium back in the fight . . .

Out the gate the pace was high as we made twists and turns through the city.  All was going well until about 30 k in I had a mechanical and had to pull off the road.  The fix took longer than expected and I lost sight of HAMMER and significant ground.  I started chasing as hard as I could with the words of my first cycling mentor, Chris “Der Hase” (RABBIT) Burke . . . “There is no coasting in the chase group!” on auto repeat in my cranium . . .

We covered the first 40 k in under an hour, we were flying to the base of the climb.  And there the wheels on the bus got a little wobbly as the rain started to fall.  I was without a teammate and climbing in the rain.  I was less worried about the climb and over concerned about the decent.  I could already fill my sub-3 run fading despite the chase I made . . .

 A BIG BUMP in the middle!

Over the top of the climb I held back as rain pelted my face.  I was not ready to hit the ground as I still had a few more smaller climbs to go over.  On the last climb the sky cleared and dry patched appeared on the road.  Alone in no-man’s-land I knew I had to put on my best 20 k TT and got down on the drops with all I had left in the tank.  I knew I would make the sub-3 hr mark but I still wanted it to give my best effort.  I was back in the game . . .

I was soon caught by a strong group of 3 cats and together we started the leap frog to groups up the road.  On one such effort the guy ahead of me started to fade short of closing the gap and I finished the bridge to a small group of four.  As we made a turn I faded back and almost laugh as I was in a pack of at least 30 riders.  There were a lot of cats hanging on and I joined them for a slight break . . .

As I moved back up to the front I hit a serious hole in the road that sent a jolt through the wheels, frame, and my body.  I though I flatted as I pulled to the side of the road stopping to check the bike with just under 10k to go to the finish . . .

The wheels checked out fine and back on it I went catching the last group that passed me.  It was then that I noticed my handlebars had rotated forward and the riding position was now not only awkward but uncomfortable.  I was fighting to keep position and loosing this battle . . .

Snapped off the back of a surge to the finish, I rolled in the last 3 k solo and well over my goal of a sub-3 hr 104 k that had 1300 m of climbing.  My total time was 3:20 and some slight change . . . a 24 min improvement over last year.  Off my target but an improvement non-the-less. 

HAMMER came close to a sub-3 at just under 3:10.  Danny on the other hand had an epic ride.  At one point a driver decided to run the police barricade and took Danny and 4 other riders down.  Danny saw what was happening and slowed before the impact.  He bounced across the hood of the car and I believe recalled all of his combat airborne training on how to do a parachute landing fall.  He and the bike survived without a scratch.  He manned up an additional time and got back going.  He and the cats involved in the incident limped home with only a little mis-direction drama.  Big props to Danny for making it happen with challenges more than most . . . a number of riders did not finish the race at all . . .

So, with 9 days before my next race, I’ll take the 3rd improvement on time and my little personal hat trick.  I will turn my eyes and attention on refining the Rabid TURTLE Training Plan as I need to work on raising the redline so I can surge the TURTLE engine up right to the limit or just over it without falling apart or forcing a lung to jump out my chest . . .

My season is still on track and this is the best of a bikeROCKstar life I can currently imagine . . .